Comments to: crs@uvm.eduReviewed as of 4/20/98
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EXERCISE 5
Non-Verbal Expression
How do I communicate with thee? Let me count the ways: with
words, to be sure, but also with eye contact, with my body posture,
by head and facial movements, with the quality of my voice, by
touch and gesture, with silence.
Becoming conscious of all of the ways we communicate without
words is essential to becoming an effective leader. There are a
number of popular articles on so-called body language, all of which
might help us understand how we can assure that these non-verbal
expressions are consistent with the verbal message we are trying to
deliver to another.
While skills of non-verbal expression are known to affect the
quality of communication between individuals, they are also useful
in work with groups and in public presentations.
Think of the last time you heard an effective public lecture,
for instance. What can you recall about the speakers non-verbal
behavior? If you saw that person on a videotape, without sound,
what could you tell about the speaker and the rapport between
speaker and audience?
And in a group, how would you use non-verbal communication
skills to influence the ability of the group to work together? Are
there ways to support others without words? Can you communicate
anger, impatience, appreciation or understanding without words?
What happens when a person's body language is saying something that
appears to conflict with their verbal message?
> Learner Activity: Using the checklist that follows, the learner
could observe speakers during the training session, interviewer and
guests on television talk shows, or a speaker and listener in a
triad exercise. In the latter, three people could take turns
playing the roles of speaker, listener, and observer in an attempt
to practice the integration of the several interactive
communication skills.
> Note to leaders on non-verbal expression: Using the pages from
Bob Biagi's Working Together, University of Massachusetts,
Cooperative Extension Service, or other sources, provide learners
with information on the following:
þ Non-verbal communication in groups
þ Distance and seating in groups
þ Cross-cultural differences in non-verbal behavior
Non-Verbal Expression
A Checklist of Behavior
Behavior observed Check the behavior
(check all observed) to observe
> Eye Contact
l. Spontaneous eye contact and eye movement
2. Breaking eye contact
3. Staring too intensely
4. Looking down
5. Looking directly at speaker when speaking
6. Looking directly at speaker when listening
7. Looking away
8. Staring blankly
> Body Posture
l. Slight forward lean
2. Body facing speaker
3. Relaxed posture
4. Relaxed hand position
5. Spontaneous hand and arm movements
6. Gestures for emphasis
7. Touching speaker
8. Relaxed leg position
9. Slouching
10. Fixed, rigid position
11. Physically too close to speaker
12. Physically distant from speaker
13. Arms across chest
14. Body turned sideways
> Head and Facial Movements
l. Affirmative head nods
2. Calm, expressive facial movements
3. Appropriate smiling
4. Expressions matching speaker mood
5. Face rigid
6. Continual nodding
7. Extraneous facial movements
8. Continual smiling
9. Little smiling
10. Cold, distant expression
11. Frowning
12. Overly-emotional reactions
> Vocal Quality
1. Pleasant intonation
2. Appropriate loudness
3. Moderate rate of speech
4. Simple, precise language
5. Fluid speech
6. Monotone
7. Too much effort
8. Too loud
> Distracting Personal Habits
l. Playing with hair
2. Fiddling with pen or pencil
3. Chewing gum
4. Smoking
5. Drinking
6. Tapping fingers or feet
7. Other
> Videotape Exercise: To improve awareness of the non-verbal
communication skills of yourself and others.
Arrange for a videotaping of a group meeting or one or one
conversations with a real agenda or at least real discussion. In
the case of a two-person conversation, have each spend half of the
allotted time in a listener role, the other in the role of speaker.
Film unobstrusively, if possible, for five to ten minutes.
Play the videotape back twice without sound; the first time
ask each participant to observe themselves, perhaps using the
checklist above. The second time, ask each participant to observe
another, using a similar checklist. Then, in turn, ask for
self-observations and those of the other observer.
If the opportunity to film discussions is not possible, choose
a videotape of a television show or movie and play an appropriate
section or sections, again without sound, and ask each participant
to concentrate on the skills of an individual. Discuss their
observations, and if helpful, play the video a second time with
participants "watching" for the non-verbal interactions.
Listening Skills
Look Power
This exercise is a way to practice non-verbal skills and attempt to
interpret the non-verbal language of others. It's an exercise that
always reminds me of when I was a kid, out with my parents visiting
relatives. I always knew when I was doing something wrong or when
I could have a piece of candy. My mother never said a word to me;
all she did was look, that was enough. In fact, my aunts, knowing
the rules of the language, would stand in front of me so that I
couldn't see my mother when they offered me some candy.
That's what this exercise is all about. See if you can send and
receive messages accurately.
> Part I--Close-ups
l. Divide into groups of threes (triads) and call one person A, one
B, and one C.
2. Have A and B sit about six feet apart with C as an observer.
3. A and B are to look intently at one another and then slowly move
their chairs to within three feet of each other. Stop for a few
seconds, and then move to within one foot or less of each other.
Have A and B look at each other for at least one minute.
4. Have A and B describe what they felt and observed as they moved
closer. Then C can share some observations about the interaction.
> Part II--Saying it without words
1. Now A and C are to sit facing each other with B as an observer.
2. A and C are given different lists which contain several
attitudes to be communicated. B will be given copies of both lists
(see sample lists on the following page).
3. A and C will alternately try to communicate the attitudes
described on their lists. It would be helpful to give a sheet of
paper to all three people so they can take notes and record what
they interpret from the non-verbal messages.
4. Only B will know what both A and C are trying to communicate,
and B will take notes on A and C. It would be interesting for B,
the observer, to watch the receiver of the messages rather than the
sender, to see what non-verbals they are unconsciously sending. In
this case, it would be helpful if A and C did not know that B was
observing the receiver.
5. After 5 or 10 minutes (depending upon how involved people are
with the task), have A and B share their attitudes and lists, and
compare the notes taken by all three people.
6. Allow about 10 minutes to discuss the following questions:
þ How accurately did A and C communicate the
non-verbal messages?
þ How accurately did they receive the messages?
þ What problems did each have?
If there is time and the triads have an interest in sharing
what happened with other triads, put up a score card and see how
accurately each of the small groups interpreted the messages.
Encourage people to share what they learned from the exercise.
"Look Power" task sheet for participant "A"
(Copy this sheet for A and B)
You are at a regular meeting of your group or board. Try to
communicate the following non-verbal messages to your partner (C)
without making any auditory sounds (take about 30 seconds for
each):
l. You're excited about the issue that is now being dealt with in
the meeting.
2. You couldn't care less about what happened on this new issue.
3. You really want to get on to the next topic, which interests you
a great deal more than the current one.
4. You're upset with the way things are going in the meeting.
5. You have to go to the bathroom.
6. It's time for a break.
7. You're wondering why the chairperson doesn't stop talking and
let someone else speak.
"Look Power" task sheet for participant "C"
(Copy this sheet for B and C)
You are at a regular meeting of your group or board. Try to
communicate the following non-verbal messages to your partner (A)
without making any auditory sounds (take about 30 seconds for
each):
l. Why doesn't the person next to you shut up so that you can hear
what's going on in the meeting?
2. You agree with the point just made by A, who is sitting across
the table.
3. Your rushed dinner doesn't agree with your stomach.
4. You want to say something if there is time left.
5. You want very strongly to answer the person who just spoke, but
you keep getting interrupted.
6. You want a stick of gum which someone else has in their pocket.
7. You're tired and you want to go home.
Comments to: crs@uvm.edu
Reviewed as of 4/20/98